by David Blue (Guitarist of MESH)

Greetings!

For those of you just tuning in, my name is David Blue and I play guitar in a local band in Dayton, OH called MESH. A couple of months ago I wrote an article about the band's secret origin ( we we're all bitten by a radio-active spider in Tony's barn (he's the drummer man), and thus transformed into super-human musicians), and I also talk a bit about our practices and performances.

This time I would like to talk about MESH's quest for a demo-tape!! We've been playing out about twice a month (usually the same old place) and we've been pretty successful on the crowd-o-meter. We have finally gotten serious about performing at other venues and made some phone calls inquiring about what these clubs need before they book us. Most of the owners want a demo tape and play list because it's much more convienent than coming out and seeing us. So with this in mind, we went to the studio to cut a couple of tracks. I'll save the details about the studio for later, but I'll give you the low down about the phone-tag games right now.

Your mission, if you decide to take it, is to obtain a demo tape, play list and bio-- place it in a plain envelope and deliver it to Greg (or Sean, or Tom, or the bar maid- Ms. Place), then call back.

Me: I accept, you will have your requested documents and information in 3 days.

As promised, I upheld my end of the bargain, and delivered the goods --ON TIME. But read closely this is where the fun begins.

Time: One Week Later--

Me: "Hi, is Tom( Sean, or Greg) there?"

Secret Professional Employee: "Huh?, why?,.......Who's asking"

Me: "This is David Blue with the band Mesh, I dropped off a tape last week, and I was wondering if you got it?"

Professional Employee: "uh, Greg's not here now, but I'm sure he got it. Call back before 11:00 am tommorrow," CLICK!

Me: "Okay, thank you very much"

Other secretly recorded calls:

RING! RING!

Lots of noise in background---"Timothy's!"

Me: "Yes, I need to speak with Tom"

Young Urban Employee Boy: "Uh, let me see if .... Uh, who's calling please?"

Me: "Yes, this is David Blue of MESH, we dropped off.....etc....."

Same Dude: "Who? FISH?"

Me: "No, M E S H !, like what I make your Mom wear!" --( I really didn't say that )

Dude: " Oh, okay, let me check............ Uh he's in the bathroom.. and uh.... he's kinda busy.... can he call you back--(this is true)"

Me: "sure, just make sure he washes his hands"--don't you really wish it was okay to be a smart alec? again that last line was for my enjoyment.

Take TWO!!!

RING! RING!

"Yeah, this is Sneeker's"

Me: " yes, is Sean there please"

Busy Sounding Man: "You got him...."

Me: (I'm a bit excited now cause I actually got a hold of oh most important tape listener, band booking man. So in my best Dana Carvey voice from Wayne's World, I proceed to initiate a professional conversation with "The MAN") "Uh... hello .... sean?....uh..yeah.... i'm ..uh ... the.. guitar man from the band mesh?..... uh did you get a chance to listen to our demo tape?>......"

Sean Man: "Ummmm no, but I did get it"

2 or 3 seconds of uncomfortable silence...............

Sean Dude: "Tell you what, call me back next week, OK?"

Me: "Okay, sounds good"

NEXT WEEK

RING RING!!

"Sneekers!!"

Me: (I'm more comfortable now, since Sean Man and I go way back)

"Yes, is Sean there?"

The Man: "You got him!" (Wow, twice in a row !)

Me: "Hey, yeah, this is blah blah.... blah .. blah. Did you listen to the tape yet?"

The Not So Professional Sean: " Uh no, not yet. I've been so busy lately, I'm moving into a new house, the realty agent is a nag, the bar has been so hectic, my wife just had kittens, the dog's back to binge drinking again,sob sob sob story............"

Me: "uh okay, do you need a Walkman?, or did we forget to put instructions in the package on how to run the tape?"--- sorry, For My Amusement Only..

Mr Excuse Sean: "tell you what.... call me in two weeks...okay?" CLICK!

me: " Hey, what a great idea......do you get paid extra to be the Think Tank over there?"---I'm really brave when no one's on the line.

TWO WEEKS LATER......

RING RING!!!

"SNEEKERS!!"

Me: " hey man, is Sean around please?"

What's The Excuse Today Sean: "This is him---"

Me: "Yeah, Sean , this is David Blue from MESH, did you get that new Hi-Fi stereo system we had custom built for you and delivered to your bedroom to listen to our *%$#**@! tape?"

The above quote was made at band practice, not directly to The Main Man Sean.

The bottom line with Sean is...... He's got a stack of tapes that he is behind on, blah blah blah, So anyway, we haven't chatted with The Man for a few days. We're thinking of hauling our gear to the club and playing in the parking lot for the demo with Sean hog-tied to a speaker..just to show him that we care.

I hope I've gotten my point across about the rigors of trying to play other venues. I'm not sure every band has these exact problems (but I sure hope so--I don't like thinking we suck that bad). It's funny how people treat you when you're just starting out, who knows?--maybe some people treat you that way all the time--I'm sure they just need some love. That's what I'm going to do next time a club owner treats me like crap, a big group HUG!!! Watch out Van Halen, Here we come.

No one said it was easy, but it sure looks easy when you walk into a club and see the band up there jammin'--doesn't it? I guess that's one of the reasons that there are so many wanna-be-popular bands. That, and the idea of being paid for being popular and doing what love to do most--PLAYIN'. Well, that's all I have for now folks. I hope to have some more positive news to bring to the net next time. But, if I don't, we'll still have some fun with UN-NICE people, and I promise to keep you updated about the crazy hijinks of Sean, Greg and Tom--God Bless 'EM All!!!!

Until next time.....